morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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