I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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