I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
