come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize