Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
