What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize