That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
