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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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