We got so high we made milksteak
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
