I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
