I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
