He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
