haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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