why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
