Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Randomize
