Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
