I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
he just fucked me for my cheese..
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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