Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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