You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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