called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
