if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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