Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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