i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
