I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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