i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
