I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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