we have officially lost it.
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Randomize
