JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize