I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
