Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
