I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
