Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
