Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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