Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
