why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
