Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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