I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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