I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We were destined to go to rehab together
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
