I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
