the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Drake has all the answers
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
