K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
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