I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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