Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
how drunk are you?
Several
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize