it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
