is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
