Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
