Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
