Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Its about making memories worth repressing
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I know her cup size but not her name....
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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