just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
