Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
i out mim tonsoeep
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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